My least proud 2013 moments…

A new year is starting and we all enter it with fake commitments, and promises that we are unable to keep for more than a few weeks. It is also a good time to reflect on last year and how we want to remember it. What comes to your head when you think about 2013? A proud achievement? A sports victory? A successful promotion, whether from a job or from diapers to potty? For me, given that my life evolves around my house and kids, what stands out from the daily routine are the stuff I do that deserve a medal for their silliness. I am sure I do some stuff right, like…. hum….. wait, I am thinking….. there are so many examples…. nothing comes to mind at the moment, but I can assure you, I DO SOME STUFF RIGHT! But the things that stick are the stupid ones. And this year, I totally surpassed myself…

The first example happened very recently and it is so fresh in my memory that I cringe as I am writing it. For once in my life, I bought some Christmas presents in advance. OK, don’t get too excited, I only bought a few… Most of them were still purchased on the 24th. But for once, I found something for the kids that I liked so I decided to get it. Just like that. When I got home, I did not know where to hide the presents – so I did what every sensible mother would do: I asked my husband to hide them. It sounds a trivial detail to write, but it turns out to be majorly important to my (unfortunately) true story. One Wednesday night (again, sounds trivial, but it is a critical part of the story), I asked my husband where he had hidden the presents.

“I put them on top of the recycle trash can”

“You WHAT?”

” I put them on top of the recycle trash can. Why?”

“Because I took the trash out earlier and the presents have been …. RECYCLED!”

Bummer!!! That will teach me to shop in advance… To add insult to injury, the trash gets collected on a Wednesday so had I asked the question a few hours earlier, I would have been able to save the situation. Once I realized that the presents were a goner, I made sure that I would not get the blame for it. So first, I tried to convince my husband that he was the one who took the trash out that week. I did not succeed… I think the fact that he was in Europe the whole time did not help my case. So then I decided that it was his fault anyway. Because who puts bunch of new stuff in a paper bag on the recycling trash? Still, not my proudest moment of the year.

Another thing I am not too proud of is getting really angry at some lady who decided that stopping for a school bus was not for her. It just happened to be my daughter’s school bus. As she drove off, I turned toward her car and shouted, “What the f%@^? Are you insane?”. A few days later, my daughter and I were playing lego and Skye dropped something on the floor. She was trying to put the pieces back together but the poor thing has inherited my patience gene (or lack of) so she got really frustrated and went, “Oh Gosh! What the f@#%?” Oops… I could not even tell her off, she is way too smart for that sort of things. I already got the, “Can only adults talk badly?” question so I just pretended I did not hear her. She went on, “What the f#%@? mom!!”.

“I don’t know, honey. Should we play something else?”

“Yeah, but what the f$@%?”

“OK, I think it is quite enough of this” I wanted to be really mad, but it was hard not to burst out laughing…

“What? What the f#^%?” I had to stop this. So I did the only sensible thing: I lied.

“We don’t say “what the f%@!”, we say “what the truck!” But it’s really bad, you are not supposed to say that, ok?”

“OK. What the truck!” It worked!!

It’s not a perfect solution. Because when she says, “What the truck!”, it is pretty obvious what she means. But it’s ok. I am now working on perfecting the lie and telling her teachers that Skye is obsessed with trucks and that’s why she is saying that. A mom’s got to do what a mom’s got to do…






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