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my two cents about teenagers…

I have a theory about teenagers. I don’t have any yet. Getting closer, but not just quite… So I am just ranting about something I know nothing about. But still, I do have a theory!

Many books have been written about how to deal with teenagers, how to handle them, ourselves, or simply survive the teenage storm. And, like diet books, if so many keep being written, it’s because there isn’t an answer that works for everybody. We all have different personalities and baggage, so do our kids. So how can we find a statement that fits all?

Well, that was BEFORE ME! Now, you have me! Although I can’t tell you how to handle your teenage kids given that I can barely handle my four year old, I think I have worked out how to tell what kind of teenagers your kids will turn into. That’s pretty MAJOR, isn’t it?!!!

Based on zero expertise, and even less experience. But like the saying goes, “I was a very good parent before I had kids”, I can say with a straight face that I know teenagers even though some might argue (quite rightly so) that I am completely clueless. So if you are still reading, rest assured that you will learn nothing from this post but you might get a good chuckle out of it. Right, you have been warned!

My theory is this:

If your child is a bit all over the place all the time, kind of an attention-seeker, sneaking on his video games when you are not watching, ignoring most of what you say unless you are half an inch away from his face, and generally pretty careless about everything, then chances are, he will grow to be the exact same as a teenager. And by the way, I think that this is good news! No surprise, no sudden change of attitude, just the same kid with a deeper voice.

If your child is a sweet kid, super obedient, listens to everything you say and wouldn’t dream of doing anything that could upset you, Man! You are in for a tough ride!!! I am convinced that these joyful gems turn into complete aliens. They give you attitude to the power of a trillion, they are unrecognizable, the polar opposite of their adorable young years.

Just a side note, if you have a girl, read all the books, get some help and expect the unexpected. No actually, worse than that. If you just get the unexpected, it will be good news.  Just, just…. Oh, I don’t know what to say! Just be afraid! Be very afraid!!!

Do you want to know what type I was? I was the sweetest little girl ever. No trouble at all. Grew to be the nicest teenager. Never gave my dad any trouble – super safe to write that, my dad does not speak English so he will never know…

Argh, dad, honestly, I am sorry! For whatever it is worth now, you were not always wrong and I most definitely did not know better than you. Well, not always anyway… (I still have some teenage spirit in me!)

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