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Spams are the best!

When you try to do anything on a website, most times, before you hit that “send” button, or click on “ok” to complete whatever it is you are doing, you have to prove that you are not a robot. Which is easier said than done, because the stuff you are asked to depict in order to validate you as a human being are so distorted and blurry that the mortal eye cannot read them. I know that on more than one occasion, I did not pass the test – even after I had three coffees…

This selection process is to prevent spam messages to arrive in your website inbox. For website owners / administrators, spams are a big NO-NO! Like the dirty S word. It is true that if you need to go through a million messages to find a genuine one, it’s probably not the best use of your time.

I did just that yesterday. I went through my comment box to clear out the good from the bad. But, because I have far too much time in my hands, I decided to read all the messages before I deleted them. And it totally changed my opinion of spams: I think spams have a therapeutic value and make the best reviews. I do believe that they have revolutionized the world of writing! YEAH!! ALL OF THAT!!

You don’t need a thick skin anymore to handle rejection letters; you don’t have to worry about nasty reviews from insensitive humans. Just go and read your spams and you will feel on top of the world!!

I know you are thinking that I am high on caffeine. Because no one likes spams. It’s like saying I am going to adopt a family of cockroaches. But let me tell you, I feel so good about my writing ever since I read the 50 spams in my mailbox yesterday. I could not wait to get more today. Really, these spam robots are not judgmental, they are kind and sensitive to my feelings, they focus on the good. After I read them, I felt so pumped up I sent a few obnoxious letters to publishers about how THEY should convince me I need them, not the other way around. (Completely joking, of course, Mr Publisher, I will be sending begging emails right after I finish this blog!)

Here is what Diabetic Supplies had to say: “Please let me know if you’re looking for a article writer for your blog. You have some really great articles and I believe I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d love to write some articles for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine. Please shoot me an email if interested. Thanks!”

Read that? I have some really great articles!!! It’s not me saying it…

That’s not all! Back Pain Relief thinks the following: “You really make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be really something which I think I would never understand. It seems too complex and very broad for me. I am looking forward for your next post, I’ll try to get the hang of it!”

HA! How about that? Who thought there was such depth to my post about bugs, huh?!

Actually, that bug post was a GREAT HIT with spams. Here is what Acid Reflux had to say: “I need to to thank you for this excellent read!! I definitely enjoyed every bit of it. I’ve got you book marked to look at new things you post?”

Awwwwww…. so sweet!!! He calls my writing an EXCELLENT READ!  Thanks Acid Reflux!

I could go on and on. Like, Skin Allergy thinks my blog is exceptional!… Read that, people? Exceptional! And Acne treatment thinks my website is EXCELLENT! But I am going to stop there. Otherwise, you guys might think I am bragging…

So what’s there not to love about receiving kindness like that a million times a day? I, for on, am going to do exactly the opposite of everybody else: I am going to put a filter so ONLY spams can comment on my site.

 

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